Don't Look Any Further
by BossaNovaBaby24
Summary: Set after "Day In The Life" One-shot: Bill and Laura discuss Bill's recent mood in the CIC and whats behind it.


**Authors Note**

**Little one shot of Bill and Laura, just after the episode "A Day In The Life" **

**I sure did enjoy writing this one, so I hope you like it. **

**Disclaimer: do not own any of the characters used, which is just as well, as I'd go crazy with the power.**

"You went and checked on Nicky at the day-care?" Laura asked, standing at CIC with Tigh.

"Yeah," Bill stated with a sigh, reaching the centre table, and looking up at dradis.

"How was it?" Tigh asked. He was as concerned as Bill about Nicky's parents, still in Life Station. The Chief and Cally were going to be alright, but Bill, Laura and Saul were more concerned about how the child would live without his parents for a while. He was too young to understand what had happened, but he was sure to realise their absence for such a large period of time.

"It was horrible," Bill grunted, staring at Saul, "screaming, running, and pushing to get out of the door …. And the kids were no better."

The silence after this statement seemed to last forever. Suddenly without warning, Tigh snorted, before laughing. Laura and Bill both joined in. Watching her, Bill realised that this was the first day in a long time where Laura had been herself, laughing and making jokes.

_I wonder if she did go to the gym, _Bill thought, regarding the laughing president before him.

"I take it," Laura said slowly, catching her breath in between the words, "the person in charge is having a bad time?"

Bill smiled briefly, and nodded. He turned his attention back to the dradis. The president and XO managed to pull themselves together, and the seriousness returned.

"Thanks for covering for me, Saul. You're dismissed."

"Sir." Tigh nodded, saluted and left the CIC abruptly.

Laura looked at Bill, concerned at his sudden brooding. She made sure no-one was looking, and lightly touched the top of his hand with her own.

"Bill?" She enquired quietly, "Something on your mind? You've been acting odd all day."

His last conversation with her had left her both confused and slightly worried. He had enquired about the cabin she wanted to build, and the conversation made her slightly hopeful. She was honest with him, but after that, he seemed so distant. Unreachable. As if he had something terrible on his mind. Tigh knew, but he refused to tell her, saying it was "the Old Man's Business" and no-one else's.

Bill stood still, and she was beginning to anticipate the moment when he'd pull his hand away and say it was nothing.

_Stupid Bill, _she thought as he continued to stand silently, _Let someone in. Don't keep these things bottled up._

"It's my anniversary today," He muttered quietly, not daring to look at Laura's expression. He talked as casually as if their conversation was about routine weapon checks.

"Ahh." Laura replied. She wasn't surprised at all. He still wore the ring, so she guessed that he still held it in high regard. It all started to fall into place. The conversation, his visit to day-care, and his darkened mood.

"I was never there for Lee and Zak," He stated, this time, looking straight into Laura's eyes. She could see the pain hidden in them, covered by his strong 'Admiral' façade. He wanted so desperately to be forgiven for it, to be given penance for his mistakes, "I do not want the same for Tyrol and Cally's son."

Laura removed her hand from his, and he felt the cold against his skin, and covered up his disappointment. However, as soon as her hand left his, she moved closer, this time placing her hand on his shoulder.

"Bill," she looked over her glasses at him, her expression serious, "They'll be fine. Cottle, gods rest his cynical, cigarette smoking soul, will be releasing them when they're ready. That could be as soon as a couple of weeks. Don't think on it for a second."

Bill sighed, and hung his head, "but what if-?"

"No Bill," Her tone was firm, putting an end to his futile arguments, "don't think on it. Don't look any further. And, if it's any consolation, you're here right now, for your son. He looks up to you Bill, he loves you. Don't dwell on the past, live for the present."

He smiled at her, lifting her hand off of his shoulder and taking it in his own. The crew around him busied themselves with their duties, not knowing what was going on and giving the two leaders some privacy.

Laura's thumb lightly brushed against Bill's wedding ring, and he squeezed her hand comfortingly.

"It s stupid really," He stated quietly, looking into Laura's enquiring gaze, "It's been so long now, since we divorced, since the attack. And yet, every year, on this day, it all comes back. I don't mean to, but … it haunts me. I was such a bad husband and father. I should have been there for them, and I wasn't."

Laura looked at him, and smiled sadly, "It's too late to do anything about that Bill. Move on from it and think about what's going on now. I won't let you brood over this. Especially, if it affects the fleet." With that last sentence, she moved back and crossed her arms grandly.

Bill smiled, and she returned it.

"Is that an order Madame President?"

"If it takes that for you to stop brooding on the past, then yes Admiral, that's an order."

The use of their titles was playful, and Bill suddenly felt a lot better, his thoughts of Carolanne disappearing. All his thoughts were now focused on the woman standing in front of him. _She _was who he wanted now, not Carolanne, and suddenly he felt his heart beat faster. It would take time, a lot of it, but they'd be together. One day. And this was the hope he held on to.

Seeing him smiling, Laura looked at him questioningly. He couldn't tell her what was on his mind, not now and certainly not in the middle of CIC. Laura smiled widely and said;

"Poor lady in charge of Day-care. It's your fault, Admiral."

He raised his eyebrow, before gruffly replying, "how so Madame President?"

"You're the one who gave the order to 'start having babies'. You didn't think of that poor woman first though, did you?"

Bill snorted, and burst out laughing. Leaning on Laura for support, who was also chuckling, he felt a lot better, forgetting completely about the anniversary, and instead looked towards his future, hopefully with Laura.


End file.
